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Author: Subject: My Story & The Beginning.
js2004
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[*] posted on 14-6-17 at 06:59 PM


Bed Time Thoughts

Another day free of P&M and loving life.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 15-6-17 at 09:56 AM


Late Morning Thoughts

I'm just going to say that I too will miss this site should it disappear from cyberspace. It was really one of the first resources I found when I realized I had a problem with P&M. While I freely admit tuning in and out to the site, lately I found myself posting and trolling a lot. It has become therapeutic for me again.

There are literally 1000's of stories on here to read and learn from. Even the partners posts have helped me realize the pain and hurt that our loved ones feel. For me it was a real wake up call and one that continues to help me everyday - the thought of putting my wife through the pain described on some of the posts is unbearable.

The emptiness this sickness causes in ones life is heart wrenching and one that became real to me as I read others stories several months ago when I came here for the first time. So thank you to all who came here before me and good luck to all that have shared their story.
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js2004
Junior Member
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 15-6-17 at 01:39 PM


Late Afternoon Thoughts.

Long day, but determined to get through it P&M free. Stress at work is really getting me down, so many changes in workload and personalities driving me nuts. I need to stay focused and understand my triggers and how to avoid them. One of the keys to my success. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 16-6-17 at 04:01 AM


Early Morning Thoughts

It's good to be alive, alert and P&M free another day!
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 16-6-17 at 10:54 AM


Afternoon Thoughts

I feel pretty good today. After a few days of being in a funk I finally feel better. Not sure why I was in a funk but I made it and dealt with the temptations when they came and made it through. So onward and upward.
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js2004
Junior Member
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 16-6-17 at 07:54 PM


Bed Time Thoughts

It was a good night, went for pizza and the movies with my son. P&M free another day and now it's off to bed. Thanks for reading!
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 17-6-17 at 04:06 AM


Early Morning Thoughts

Good morning all. I can't sleep but thankfully I have no desire to look at P. Sitting on the back porch enjoying a cup of coffee without that P fog clouding my judgement. Before I would have been in the basement iPad in hand. Now I can sit outside and enjoy life and the blessings that my higher power has bestowed on me and pray for more. I wake up with mental energy to be successful in my sobriety today. I have to keep the right attitude and focus on today, know my triggers, and find help when the temptations come. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 17-6-17 at 09:09 AM


Mid Morning Thoughts.

Been trolling again on the partners side. As heart breaking as many of the stories are it is very motivating to me. I cannot and will not let this sickness harm my family anymore. I have to stick to the program, reach out when necessary and not put myself in a situation where I am tempted. I value the people in my life and have no discretion to push them out because of P&M. It sickens me to think about my past behavior and the harm I have already caused but I am determined to stay P&M free. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 17-6-17 at 12:50 PM


Afternoon Thought

Been a long day and I'm tired. But I have to sit through a dance recital this evening, so no rest for me until late. No temptations have hit but I have been craving my SO all day. Can't stop thinking about her and it's making me fired up. Need to relax, maybe sit and meditate or post on here. At any rate I need to calm down and breath. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 17-6-17 at 08:19 PM


Bed Time Thoughts

Long day topped off with a headache, lovely, but P&M free another day. Night all!
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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[*] posted on 18-6-17 at 08:04 AM


Morning Thoughts

Today will be a struggle. Feeling very anxious right now and very tempted. Thankfully I'm heading to church and have a jam packed day. Keeping it on an hour by hour basis.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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[*] posted on 18-6-17 at 06:13 PM


Mid Evening Thoughts

Made it, and looking forward to bed. Very long day but I'm P&M free another day. Night all.
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js2004
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[*] posted on 19-6-17 at 06:10 AM


Morning Thoughts

Tough day already. Rejection and stress are definitely triggers and I'm feeling both right now. Thankfully I am at work so no chance of P&M. I need to stay in the here and now and take it one hour at a time. I need to keep my mind calm and pray when things get rough. The phone meeting I attended was packed this morning, but I need to stay positive and keep plugging away.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 19-6-17 at 10:46 AM


Afternoon Thoughts

Eight more hours to go. My feet are killing my and my legs are aching for some reason. But I'm still P&M free so that's my positive for right now and with just about half the day over. Really looking forward to Friday when vacation starts. Just need to get through today though. Thanks for reading.
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theriverlethe
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[*] posted on 19-6-17 at 03:21 PM


Good going!
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 19-6-17 at 07:25 PM


Bed Time Thoughts

The afternoon was much easier and as I lay here I am amazed at how quickly temptations fade once I get my mind focused on something else. In fact I haven't really thought about any P&M related issues since my last post on here this morning. Funny I guess, the mind and spirit heals itself sometimes. Anyways, off to bed. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 20-6-17 at 07:51 AM


Morning Thoughts

Another day free of P&M. Today is turning out to be a good day. No temptations at the moment and I'm really busy at work today. Hope all is well and thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 20-6-17 at 03:55 PM


Evening Thoughts

Road rage gets to me, it always has. So temptations are there and I'm home alone, so even worse. On here trolling to remind myself how destructive P&M can be to my life. I'm certain I will overcome this urge but in the end it is still difficult. This place is a constant reminder of the awfulness of this disease.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 20-6-17 at 07:10 PM


Bedtime Thoughts

Made it and another day P&M free. I'm beat though and ready to just crash. Thanks for reading.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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[*] posted on 21-6-17 at 09:10 AM


Late Morning Thoughts

Another day under my belt. Certainly becomes easier with time and focus. Other days when my stress level is high or when I have unstructured time is when it is a struggle. Today is good though.

It would certainly be nice if there was more activity on the board. Someone's reading my posts though so that's good I guess. It's funny how this simple act of coming here in the down moments have been so helpful. So I really shouldn't complain. Thanks for reading.
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theriverlethe
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[*] posted on 22-6-17 at 01:44 PM


I enjoy reading your posts, js. Reminds me of the daily struggle this is, and it inspires me to avoid "forgetting it"
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js2004
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Posts: 108
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 22-6-17 at 05:52 PM


Come join me at Reboot Nation. I am in the 40 and up and my handle and journal title are the exact same would love to see you there.
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js2004
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Posts: 108
Registered: 10-10-16
Location: PA
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Mood: Staying Sober

[*] posted on 22-6-17 at 08:09 PM


Night all, take care and god bless.
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